I work 2 jobs so have very few days off a year, have 3 days off for this Christmas and have just wasted my first, cooking stuff for tomorrow, had to throw one lot of cooking away cos thought that the ready roll pastry I'd got was puff pastry, and it wasn't, it was filo, the thin stuff, and the thing I cooked turned into a charred flat mess, but I think I've invented a new type of burnt mushroom and bacon flavour crisp!
Then cooked some choc biscuits, everything went wrong, and after several frantic phone calls to my mother, I now know it wasn't me or my oven, it was the recipe that had the wrong amount of butter in so that's why they all turned to burnt crumbs!
I hate cooking so much, and have wasted a precious day, the 2 types of pastry related nibbles I love at Christmas I haven't got the energy to cook, so I'll wait til Boxing day. Got to face cooking dinner tomorrow too. Bleugghh.

Own up, who else has clocked up cooking disasters! It can't just be me, surely!

a couple of years ago Iput a pizza in my dads oven and left it be..10 minutes later I smell smoke, go out and the oven is up in flames! My dad called the fire brigade in a panic, they put the fire out so it was all good in the end!

The good side was one of the firemen was fine and he ended up chatting me up..sounds like a lie I know but it was gas, we didnt swap numbers but aw the regret lol

It was while funny looking back but at the time it was panic stations haha

I tried to make wild rice in the microwave once. I made it in this big plastic bowl, and at one point I had to cover it, so I stuck a small ceramic plate over the top, popped it back in the microwave, and left.

When I came back, the bowl had melted onto the plate. I didn't get my rice. :[

Last year my job did a secret santa, and I pulled the name of the CEO of the company. He loves chocolate, and I decided to make him fudge as part of his gift. My mom has an awesome recipe and I wanted to make hers, and followed it to the letter.

I was really broke financially at the time, and could only afford ingredients for one shot. I had never made fudge, but in general I'm a great cook and I figured I'd have no issues. Late that night I found out it wouldn't set up, and ended up with a whole batch of liquid fudge. I was so upset, because that was for the CEO and I had no time or money to buy anything else. T.T

I called my mom to vent, and she ended up saving my butt and offered to make me a batch herself, because she had the ingredients. She stayed up really late making it, and even dropped it off at my home on her way to work the next morning. Everyone loved her fudge, and laughed at my story of how I failed and she saved me lol.

I made a peanut butter pie last year. I guess the cooking itself wasn't a disaster, but I left it sitting on my Aunt's table. By the time we got to dessert, it was more of a soup than a pie. I was asked to bring crackers this year.

Well..... I went to preheat the oven once and my MIL apparently had some candies stored in there (don't ask....she's insane) and I didn't notice. I turned the oven on and left the room. A little while later I hear my MIL call from the kitchen.....

"Hey Kat, can you come here a minute?" she calls all calm. So I finish up whatever it was I was doing and go into the kitchen.

I get into the kitchen and My MIL is standing there grinning and snickering with 2 feet of flame shooting out of the open oven! I freak out and she laughs and just......Craziness!!!

I've burnt cookies (not bad, just the bottoms), left spaghetti in the water after it was done (all soggy), and hubby once dumped all the KD noodles into the sink trying to drain them.

It happens... we're just hoping our turkey doesn't go bad this year (first time trying).

I was helping my friend bake a cake for her boyfriend's birthday. I told her to check if it was done by inserting a skewer - if it comes out clean, it's ready. So she tried it, the skewer came out with cake batter on it so I told her to put it back in the oven. This happened several times and I thought that the cake had been baking for a very long time... how odd. I said to my friend "You have been cleaning the skewer in between checks, right?" - no, she hadn't. The cake was very overcooked!

in high school I once put pizza rolls in the microwave for 9 minutes 8D... for those unfamiliar... they're only supposed to be in there for about 45seconds.

I read the oven time >.<

;; Family never let me live it down, because I ended up walking away and came back to a kitchen full of smoke!


More recently I for whatever stupid reason threw left over fried chicken in the toaster oven... flames were near leaking out the sides of the front oAo
but everything was fine. Just set the smoke alarm off for a very long time.


I think those were my biggest two.

I've also tried experimental things where they turn out nasty XD
tried to make break and bake cookes in the toaster oven and it was interesting... because they cooked... they just didn't change shape XD they stayed the block.

But I've made gross sauces, overcooked things... I'm a walking kitchen disaster... I also almost always make a huge mess.

had a pot boil over ALL OVER my stove.

OH! and I forgot one which made me never want to cook ever again. I had boiled perogies, picked out some and for whatever reason left the rest in the water on the stove(off)....ended up leaving for a weekend... was not pretty to come home to.

Um I had a friend over once and we wanted mac cheese... She decided to be the one to make it. Well she was making the sauce for it at the end and put butter in the pot to melt and she didn't realize she left the stove top set on HIGH. So, poof, the whole kitchen was filled with burnt butter smoke, and our ceiling was stained almost black above the oven for years >.<

The other day I was melting chocolate which I've done a few times before no problem.... I melted it... added the butter... and then went to add the cream. Temperature was fine, the chocolate wasn't anywhere near overcooked, but when I added the cream the whole thing turned into something that resembled chunks of wet chocolatey sponge It looked so gross! To this day we can't figure out what went wrong, I had everything just right. So weird! I just melted the same chocolate the same way yesterday and it turned out just fine.

And not so much cooking but I've had many microwave oopses. I put milk in for hot cocoa once for ten minutes instead of one and by the time I realized it it had bubbled over x.x Another time I put a square of butter in to melt it and I missed a tiny piece of the foil wrapping before I put it in... The microwave went crazy! All sparks and pops and weird lightningy stuff inside. I freaked out so bad I cried, lol. It was scary okay!

Not really a cooking disaster, but once, I was heating up pop-tarts in the microwave and accidently heated them for one minute and fifty seconds when I was trying to heat them for fifteen. We didn't get the smell out of our kitchen for a week.

I was once making kimchi, same way as I'd done every time before and since, well, ignoring minor variations, and at the end, before setting it aside to ferment, I took a small piece like I always do, just to reassure myself that it was delish. Only... it wasn't.

All I could taste was the kochukaru and this overpowering garlic/ginger mess(yes, those are all major parts in kimchi, but it was way more intense than it should have been, in a 'so gross even time won't save it' way, and idek...). My eyes watered, my sinuses cleared straight out, and my taste buds plotted to overthrow my rule. It was a disaster. Had to dump the whole thing, nearly 3 quarts.

Took me at least a week, and running completely out, to build up the will to go at it again.

My MIL spent ages trying to make a gingerbread house for Christmas but due mostly to the heat here, it kept falling apart on her. By the time she arrived with it at our house for Christmas dinner the roof had cave in. We dubbed it the Christchurch Cathedral Xmas cake. (For those not in the know, the Christchurch Cathedral has been destroyed by the earthquakes in NZ).

I burned my husband's grilled cheese sandwich today because i forgot to turn the heat down in the pan...lol whoops.

Oh and one time I was broiling someting, and the fat at the bottom of the tray caught on fire...that was fun!

Hooray! It isn't just me! Thanks peeps, feel a bit better now!
Got downstairs this morning at 7.30 and chopped the meat and seasoned it, made the dumplings, and wrote a detailed list of what time to start cooking the various elements, just hope I can pull it off!
Best of all, my husband says next year we can go out for a curry instead!
We live in a city where a quarter of the population are Muslim, so their restaurants and shops are open on Christmas day! Hooray!